Sunday, October 16, 2011

Forgiving

Restored post
Sunday, October 16, 2011

A friend and I were conversing, and he thought an experience I told him would be of value on this blog, so I include it below:

Could we really be righteous without believing/having faith in the Atonement of Jesus Christ, not only for ourselves but for others? This reminds me of an experience I had a few days ago.

As I was praying, I began praying about all of those who had hurt me in my life - from perverts to peers to siblings. As I prayed, my mind and heart opened up and I wanted with all of my heart and mind for them to be forgiven. As that happened, I saw very clearly that if I refused to condemn them, the Atonement cleared them, and it was as if they had never done anything to hurt me. The up side of that was, not only their salvation, but that it had never been done to me. The whole thing, the whole experience was (or could be) wiped clean - as if I had never been wounded and as if they had never hurt anyone. It was an awesome thing to witness, to see. A complete wiping away of the whole experience. And I saw that, in this way, each person is pulled away from Satan, who thinks he owns us.

I think what I saw was the full effects of humility, faith, and love as one person forgives. Multiply that by a billion, and you've got Satan losing, wholesale. Even a million people with that experience, ongoing, would put a serious dent into his plan to capture and enslave all of us. I rather like the idea of erasing other people's sins. Of course, being healed from the wounds is pretty enticing, as well.

That's the end of what I said to him.

One of the things that felt so profound to me was the fact that I wanted those who had hurt me to be forgiven. I didn't want them to suffer.

It reminds me of when my ex took me to court in an attempt to get custody of the kids.

I was afraid. I knew how mean he could be. I was afraid on the way to court. I was afraid while we were waiting our turn. But as soon as he sat down at one of the tables in front of the judge, I wasn't afraid anymore. As I walked to the other table, I looked at him. I could see that he hated me, and wanted only the worst for me, but it didn't affect me at all. I was filled with pure love. You have to experience it. I can't describe it, except to say that all fear was gone. Neither did I have any desire for revenge, etc. I could live in that my whole life and be happy.

(After that hearing, by the way, he did change so that he was polite to me, and safe for me to be around.)
I do want to point out something, though. Originally, I had been praying that he would leave me alone, that he would move away, that he or I would die. Finally, I decided to pray for him, instead of against him. At first, I choked on my words. Pray for his happiness? Pray for his well-being? But it became easier. By the time this court case came around, I had been praying like this for roughly around a year. I don't think I would have had this awesome experience had I not been praying for him.

No comments:

Post a Comment