This morning, during the sacrament of the Lord's supper, a memory came back to me, as well as insights about it, and I'd like to share it.
I used to be very afraid of heights. When I was a teenager, I was at Lagoon (an amusement park north of Salt Lake City, Utah) with my sister, her husband, and their two children. We were near the ferris wheel and wanted to go to the other side of the park. Above our heads was a ride. It went from one side of the park to the other, and all you did on the ride was travel from one side to the other, high above the park. My brother-in-law and my 2 or 3-year-old niece were going to ride and my sister was going to walk. My brother-in-law was a big, solid guy.
I was torn. I really wanted to ride so I could see the view, but was terribly afraid to do so. I finally decided to follow my brother-in-law. They put the three of us in one of the seats which, to my horror, had no place to put our feet (I'm sure it was to make it easier to get on and off the ride, as it was constantly moving). I really wanted to jump out and say, "No way, I'm not doing that!" But I kept quiet, and it was soon too late to do anything to escape except jump out, which would have hurt a lot.
I put my arms around my brother-in-law's neck and hid my face in his shoulder. Gradually, after I saw that having no footrest didn't make me fall out, I got brave enough to peek out. That led to slowly looking at the scenery until, about halfway through the ride, I was looking at everything. We saw my sister with the baby in the baby-backpack, the other rides, the concession stands, the parking lot.
The ride became enjoyable. I may have still held on to my brother-in-law's arm, but I was no longer terrified. I wasn't even fearful. (That didn't remove my fear of heights, by the way.)
As that experience was brought to my mind today, this thought accompanied it: Christ is my rock. Jesus is my solid foundation. As my brother-in-law was my rock that helped me overcome my fear during that ride, so Jesus is there to help me overcome all fear. Also, the feeling of safety and security that my brother-in-law filled me with returned with the memory of the incident, and I was shown that I can have that same feeling with the Lord. In everything.
My brother-in-law seemed safe and solid and, in that thing he was totally safe. But he is a man. Mortal. Human. He cannot be my salvation, nor my safety in all things. Jesus is safe. Immortal. Divine. And can be my salvation, as well as my safety, in all things.
I think this was a first real step in trusting the Lord, and I praise him for it. He is ever kind, ever beckoning, ever doing all he can to persuade us to trust him, to persuade us that he is the only place of complete safety. No matter what it is we fear, no matter what it is that has hurt us in the past or that threatens us now, he is the only safe place we can be.
I am sure there are other lessons to be learned from that experience, lessons that would bring me closer to Jesus Christ, my Lord.
In any case, I hope this recollection helps someone who reads this. I hope it helps you draw closer to the Lord, who loves you.
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