3 Wild White Horses

 When I first started going to Denver Snuffer's lectures (the 10-lecture circuit in 2013-14), the people going did things like baptize each other and take the sacrament with wine instead of water.

During the first lecture, I was living in Mesa, AZ. After the first lecture, a friend (Daryl) baptized me in the Salt River. Across the river were 3 white wild horses, peacefully grazing. After the baptism, we had the sacrament.

It was the first time I'd ever had a drink of alcohol - and it was nasty! I was encouraged to partake of the bread and wine freely, and did have two cups of wine (we drank out of disposable plastic cups).

At every lecture, from the 2nd through the last, I was aware of people partaking of the sacrament (as much bread and wine as you cared to have) and baptizing each other. I, also, partook of the sacrament with them.

At the 10th lecture, Denver inferred that the Lord wanted us baptized, but to use the words in the scriptures ("having authority") instead of "having been commissioned." Believing that to be the word of the Lord, I sought baptism at the hands of another friend (Troy). I went into the experience open to something awesome, sort of along the lines of what I had experienced when I was 8 years of age.

My spiritual antenna was open and searching. After the baptism, I felt clean. That was it. I tried not to feel let down.

Apparently, a lot of people felt let down and complained to Denver. He wrote a blog post wherein he mentioned that one of the results of baptism could be a greater understanding of scriptures. I realized that was happening to me. I was understanding even Isaiah so much more. I'd read it and think that it was so plain, why hadn't I caught that before?

As I ponder on the first rebaptism, it occurs to me that God was rewarding my faith. I was doing something that could have gotten me kicked out of my Church. And I had been adamantly against drinking any alcohol (even wondering why it was okay to take Nyquil. I did use it as a teenager, but wondered if I was disobeying the Word of Wisdom by doing so, even though the LDS Church had no problem with it for medicinal purposes), but wanted to partake of the scriptural sacrament.

I have pondered many times on the horses, and this is my present understanding:

Wild - No man or woman has tamed them. They are beyond the control of mere humans.

White - Purity, holiness

Three - The Godhead

Grazing peacefully - God accepted the baptism

Horses - Strength. Power. Beauty. Grace.

So, I am left to conclude that while God did bless the second rebaptism (peace, greater understanding of scriptures), it was the first one that got me into the gate again. Unlike when I was a child, I had more access to truth and understanding (as a child, I was baptized by fire and the Holy Ghost when I came up out of the water, but because I had been taught the lie that the Holy Ghost could only come after men had declared, "Receive the Holy Ghost," and knew nothing about the baptism of fire and the Holy Ghost, it was a precious opportunity greatly misunderstood, and lost) - and hearing, for the first time in my life, a true messenger from God, opened up the path to freedom from relying on any man.

When it finally sunk in that I did not need to obey any man (or woman), but only God, not only did shackles fall off my soul, but I felt incredible freedom.

If Gentiles crave a strongman I am left to conclude that I cannot be a Gentile because, once I realized I was free and that God approved, I desired a strongman/woman about as much as I desire to eat vomit. Nada. And prior to that, I did not desire one, but had been taught I had to have one (a man who speaks to God for me, and if he and I disagree on what God tells me, I am-by default-the one who is wrong). Talk about hell and misery! Obeying men's views of what God demands of you! I find God to be much more forgiving and understanding than humans of any age or sex.

I will take my 3 wild white horses and others can keep their human masters.